by Okaasan
Heero looked up from channel surfing when he heard the sharp knock at his door. It was early Saturday morning and he wasn't expecting anyone. A glance out the peephole showed no one so he opened the door a few inches. The only thing there was a fairly large cardboard box with his name and address scrawled onto it. He nudged the box with one toe. It moved easily and he decided that whatever was inside was probably not dangerous. He picked it up and carried it to his kitchen table.
After ripping the packaging tape from the box he waded through a few layers of crumpled newspaper before he found himself staring at...some odd-looking things. At first, the bright colors made him think they were children's toys. When realization set in his face turned scarlet red.
Resting innocently amongst the wadded up newspapers were more sex toys than he had ever known existed. There was a bright purple, sparkly dildo and another flesh-colored one that was just a little too realistic-looking. There were cock rings and dog collars, ball- gags and handcuffs, half a dozen flavors of lube, and assorted butt plugs. Confused, he picked up a string with metal balls attached to it, wondering what in the world it was for.
Another knock sounded at the door. Heero smirked and went to open it.
"Alright, who's the prankster..." he began, but trailed off when he saw Quatre's confused expression.
"Um, hi Heero. Is this a bad time?"
Heero looked past Quatre and saw Trowa leaning on the apartment balcony. There didn't seem to be anyone else.
Heero shook his head. "No, come on in. Someone just sent me a package," he said as he led them into the kitchen. "Know anything about this?" he gestured to the box.
Quatre's eyes got large.
"Oh, cool!" Trowa pushed past him to dig through the box. "I always wanted one of these!" He held up a Hello Kitty vibrator.
Quatre made a face. "Ugh, Trowa, that's sick."
Trowa leered at him. "I'm sure you could find something...interesting to do with it."
Quatre answered with a knowing smirk and began to look through the box's contents while Heero tried to put some distance between himself and the box.
"You know," Quatre said thoughtfully as he tapped his chin with the bulbous purple head of the sparkly dildo, "this has Duo written all over it."
Heero licked his lips and had to tear his gaze away from the sight of the dildo so close to Quatre's pink lips. He managed to nod in agreement.
"Yep," Trowa agreed, still looking in the box. "Duo must be behind this. You know how he's been trying to set you up with someone since he and Wufei got together." He looked up at Heero.
"What are you planning to do with all this stuff?"
Heero blinked and then shrugged. He didn't even know what half the stuff was for, let alone what he was going to do with it.
"Ooh," Quatre's eyes brightened. "I have an idea!"
Both boys eyed him warily, having been subjected to Quatre's ideas before.
Quatre's eyes began to shine with wicked lust. "We can help Heero put all this stuff to good use, and then the joke will be on Duo."
"Sounds good to me," Trowa assented and looked Heero up and down.
Heero was glad he happened to be leaning against the counter. It held him up when his knees gave out.
"WHAT?!" He glanced from one leering face to the other. "Wait a second," his gaze grew suspicious. "Duo put you up to this didn't he?"
Trowa snorted and Quatre slowly shook his head while grinning at his Japanese friend.
"Unh-unh. As a matter of fact, Trowa and I have been talking about something like this for a while."
Heero swallowed. "Something like...?"
"The three of us...spending some quality time together," Quatre murmured as he drew closer to Heero. Now Heero was sorry that the counter was behind him because he had nowhere to run.
Quatre bent forward to kiss him and Heero decided that maybe this wasn't such a bad idea after all. Especially with Trowa to help hold him up when the counter proved inadequate.
Duo snickered. "C'mon, Fei. I can't wait to see his face."
The young Chinese man rolled his eyes. "Duo, I don't know why you have celebrate this old custom. No one even remembers it anymore. And you need to stop interfering with Yuy's life."
Duo stopped on the sidewalk leading to Heero's apartment and pushed his officer's cap back on his head.
"You are an absolute stick-in-the-mud. I celebrate this holiday *because* no one else does. That makes it more fun. They don't see it coming," he rubbed his hands together. "And teasing Heero is almost as much fun as teasing you." He gave Wufei a playful bump with his hip before continuing to Heero's door. Wufei shook his head and followed.
"Heero Yuy! Open in the name of the law!" Duo pounded on the door. "We know you have contraband in there!" He banged on the door again with his "nightstick."
Heero stopped what he was doing when he heard the first knock. He looked out the peephole and saw Duo dressed as a policeman and brandishing a two-foot-long black dildo. Smirking, he stepped aside and opened the door.
"Ha!" Duo crowed as he jumped inside. "April Foo...." his voice trailed off as he spied the naked, entwined forms in the middle of Heero's living room and a very naked Heero going back to join them.
Quatre stopped sucking on Trowa's nipple long enough to say, "Hi, Duo. What's a foo?"
Duo glanced at Wufei who was losing the battle to keep a straight face.
"Apparently, I'm the `foo' this year," Duo said.
"Well, quit fooling around and join us," Heero scowled at them.
"Mm-hm," Trowa agreed as he ran his fingers through Quatre's hair. "I always wanted to see a cop strip for me."
Duo's face lit up and he turned inquiringly to Wufei.
Wufei snorted. "My mama didn't raise no `foos,'" he replied as he started shedding his clothes.
Much tomfoolery ensued.